Ok, so I am not having cold feet about marrying my fiance, I have been waiting for this day since the moment I met him (9 years ago). I am having cold feet about the big wedding. We (I) are planning our wedding from across the country. I have a deposit on both ceremony site and reception site, and DJ. We have sent out save-the-dates already and have people aready asking about booking hotels. Our wedding is in July of 2011 so I have 6 months to save and finish planning. I do not want to do it anymore. This day is not going to be about us but about our friends and family and I am miserable already. I am stressed out about not having enough money, planning flights and hotels for ourselves. I have to make a flight back in April to confirm menu, music, etc. Am I being selfish now that we have already sent out the save-the-dates and people are looking forward to it? My fiance's first response was "What? Why the change of mind? We already invited people to be in the wedding and put down deposits?" At this point I want to have a small wedding with just our parents and siblings. If he's concerned about friends we asked to be in our wedding then they are more than welcome to come. And as far as family back East, maybe we can keep the reception site and have a party in July even though most people are not going to want to come if there isn't a wedding. Am I being selfish to have a change of plans 6 months before the wedding??
I think you need to take a step back and breath. Woosah for a moment. I have been planning our destination wedding, and notice that I said I, cause it's not really "we" ;) It has been stressful, but you need to focus on what will make you happy and not everyone else. Not sure how many people you invited, or the costs, but try cutting costs where you can. For example, if you have free weekends, you can take on some DIY projects that can save you money. I made my own invitations, menu cards, candy buffet, favors etc. and on the invites alone, I saved about $300.00. Negotiate where you can, the worst answer you can get is "no".
Also on the reception piece, if your planning a sit down dinner, some places cut the cost if you give them the headcount and choice of dinner plates in advance, you can gather this information by asking it on the response cards. Either way, it should be about you and the future hubby.